Cream

Cream rises to the top, hence this is a common/ categorical reference for selected students who joined the boarding schools in the country (I'm talking about Malaysia here).

When I was younger I had always wanted to join such schools, not to be labeled as cream, but rather I wanted to be independent (I had read a lot of Enid Blyton's Mallory Towers and the like) and live far from the family. I got my wish and was sent more than 600km away from home. What I found was this: even the cream of the cream had their own issues. They (We) are kids too. Growing up with very high expectations can be inspirational in some cases and problematic in some others.

Another observation that I made is this: (contextually because I do 'career discernment' projects with high school students) where parental influence is strong in the student's life, he may be channeled to a path which he may not necessarily like or enjoy, but one which he can attempt and succeed at... because hypothetically with 11A1s, you can do anything (right?). I think this was the situation with one of my younger brothers. He was asked to do medicine, when in his heart I think he would have enjoyed IT more.

All these unfinished businesses will materialise many years down the road.

I have a friend from middle school who did IT undergraduate & masters, only to quit after a few years of teaching IT at a university to become a lorry driver. He had said he had always wanted to do it: he found the machines fascinating, but what would his parents say? A few years ago he left his teaching job, took his drivers' license, became a lorry driver with one of the oil&gas companies & only told his parents 2 years later. They did not speak to him for another 2 years, but he enjoyed EVERY SINGLE DAY of work.

Perhaps my point is we should rethink how we view our children and their 'achievements'. If the child does not qualify for boarding school, so be it. If the child is not a concert pianist or chess master or genius mathematician by 12, so be it. If he is not sporty enough, of creative enough, or accomplished enough in speaking, so be it. Keep on guiding them. Love them and continuously support them.

When I taught in the Foundation School many years back, I had taught the module called 'Personal Development' where one topic was related to "Multiple Intelligences". I was inspired by Gardner's concept that each one of us is smart in our own way. In my words: we have a place where be belong and loved being in. And finally, I think I have found mine 💖