Monologue
It is over and done with, why am I still pissed off angry?
He is moving on, renting a new place (and perhaps getting married).
I HAVE ALSO MOVED ON AND ACHIEVED A LOT, DAMN IT!
Why am I being like this? Why do I still hate the both of them?
Because he could have looked for a woman like her FROM THE VERY BLOODY BEGINNING and not waste 16 years of my freaking life! I would have made a decent living and charted my path the way I WANT IT, instead of shrinking just to make him feel better.
Why did I put up with his many misconduct and STILL be loyal? And he returned the favour by cheating on me time and time and time and time again, and by using & smearing my name. Finally he found someone to marry and went completely berserk. Nothing I did was right from that moment on. Heart-breaking and so damn demeaning. No man will be allowed to cross me like that ever again.
You kept justifying to me that it is God's will that things turned out like this- that you fell in love & you couldn't help it. BULL*******SHIT. There is a LOT of human will involved in your bleeding romance with her. You didn't have to treat me like shit, but you did. You didn't have to bed her, but you did. You didn't have to throw me under the bus and steamrolled over me, but you BOTH FREAKING DID. So it is a wonder why am I being so nice to you when I could have just cut you off and destroyed every piece of meaningless property that you owned.
Because I decided to be the bigger person. To swallow the pain and express it through my tears. Arguing with you is counter-productive & pointless, unless you suddenly grow some brains.
No matter how tacky she is, Katy Perry is great with 'break up & emerge stronger' songs. One of her recent ones is Rise:
I won't just survive
Oh, you will see me thrive
NEVER DOUBT IT BABY.
YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THE BEST OF ME YET!!!!!!
He is moving on, renting a new place (and perhaps getting married).
I HAVE ALSO MOVED ON AND ACHIEVED A LOT, DAMN IT!
Why am I being like this? Why do I still hate the both of them?
Because he could have looked for a woman like her FROM THE VERY BLOODY BEGINNING and not waste 16 years of my freaking life! I would have made a decent living and charted my path the way I WANT IT, instead of shrinking just to make him feel better.
Why did I put up with his many misconduct and STILL be loyal? And he returned the favour by cheating on me time and time and time and time again, and by using & smearing my name. Finally he found someone to marry and went completely berserk. Nothing I did was right from that moment on. Heart-breaking and so damn demeaning. No man will be allowed to cross me like that ever again.
You kept justifying to me that it is God's will that things turned out like this- that you fell in love & you couldn't help it. BULL*******SHIT. There is a LOT of human will involved in your bleeding romance with her. You didn't have to treat me like shit, but you did. You didn't have to bed her, but you did. You didn't have to throw me under the bus and steamrolled over me, but you BOTH FREAKING DID. So it is a wonder why am I being so nice to you when I could have just cut you off and destroyed every piece of meaningless property that you owned.
Because I decided to be the bigger person. To swallow the pain and express it through my tears. Arguing with you is counter-productive & pointless, unless you suddenly grow some brains.
No matter how tacky she is, Katy Perry is great with 'break up & emerge stronger' songs. One of her recent ones is Rise:
I won't just survive
Oh, you will see me thrive
NEVER DOUBT IT BABY.
YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THE BEST OF ME YET!!!!!!
posted by elya at 12:09 am
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