Wednesday, October 25, 2023

His hands weren't big enough to carry my Crown

Ex-hubby was controlling, has raging jealousy and is a very competitive person.
I really didn't know what I saw in him.
Perhaps because he was smart, tall and funny I fell hook line and sinker.

In the days counting down to the divorce, I saw the worst in him, and he likely saw the worst in me too.
Terrible energy, divorce is. 

The divorce happened on 23 March 2014. I felt relieved.

Two years of therapy followed after that.

And eventually I was okay.

I accepted the fact that shit happened.
Unfortunately the other woman was caught in the crossfire.
She eventually took off when she found out he had 5 kids.
She found out that he was married first but ignored me/ the marriage.
And at one point she was even trying to negotiate our bloody divorce.
But when the kids were made known, she took off faster than Wiley Coyote.

The actual reason: we had our issues & we were not right for each other.
I held on adamantly, stubbornly, thinking that the jealousy and control was "LOVE".
It was not. It was just a badly behaved person in a relationship with a crazy stubborn person who was completely oblivious to ALL THE WARNING SIGNS.

Truth is: his hands were too small for my crown.
And I was too disillusioned to see the truth.
In this second marriage, I hope to be a better person.
I know what I want, and we are ready for each other (I'd like to think).
Hopefully my stubbornness will serve me well this time.
I wish myself the best.

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