Things People Do
Why do people get married & have many children just to divorce later?
Why would the husband promise that he'll never abandon the (then) wife?
Why would he find the need to look for an alternative?
Why does the other woman not mind that she is contributing to a marriage breakdown?
Why is it so hard to accept (that he loves someone else)?
Yesterday I was out grocery shopping (mid-week, no less) and saw a lot of stressed fathers. The mothers are not as stressed- I guess because shopping is related to our "gatherer" instincts & not against our nature. Lots of screaming kids, and a few spilled/ broken items here & there for the supermarket to clean.
Not a terribly fun scenario I would admit. I wonder if Mr-Ex will be up to it when he re-marries and has another small little child. The Other Woman (TOW) will expect him to go everywhere with her, even on monthly/ weekly grocery shopping sprees, family events, all office functions, all social visits, all types of outings (with or without the pitiful child), all vacations & all types of celebrations! Wow, he will have a fun life. On top of that, TOW will be interested in screening his hand-phone messages, his personal & official schedules, his whereabouts, his expenses, his car odometer, what he wears & when, what he has bought without her on tow... and the list goes on.
Perhaps that is the life he wanted. "Control = Love" in his dictionary probably. Our marriage was all about that- his control over everything that I do.
One good thing that came out of the divorce is that I found (am still discovering) myself. It is a wonderful journey as I approach my 40th year and I would not replace it with anything in this world.
I am:
- a cheerful child
- an outdoorsy person (love the beaches especially, sans swimming)
- an introvert & like to be by myself (I recharge that way)
- a great teacher & love being with my students
- careful with my words & can take care of myself (when it comes to attraction from men)
- firm and beautiful and deep (... and think about things people don't)
- in touch with my soul (now more than before)
- strong and beautiful
You will make it, my dear. This too, shall pass. Life will be great- this phase is nothing but a minor setback- I will get through it and emerge fabulous from my coccoon.. xoxoxoxox
Why would the husband promise that he'll never abandon the (then) wife?
Why would he find the need to look for an alternative?
Why does the other woman not mind that she is contributing to a marriage breakdown?
Why is it so hard to accept (that he loves someone else)?
Yesterday I was out grocery shopping (mid-week, no less) and saw a lot of stressed fathers. The mothers are not as stressed- I guess because shopping is related to our "gatherer" instincts & not against our nature. Lots of screaming kids, and a few spilled/ broken items here & there for the supermarket to clean.
Not a terribly fun scenario I would admit. I wonder if Mr-Ex will be up to it when he re-marries and has another small little child. The Other Woman (TOW) will expect him to go everywhere with her, even on monthly/ weekly grocery shopping sprees, family events, all office functions, all social visits, all types of outings (with or without the pitiful child), all vacations & all types of celebrations! Wow, he will have a fun life. On top of that, TOW will be interested in screening his hand-phone messages, his personal & official schedules, his whereabouts, his expenses, his car odometer, what he wears & when, what he has bought without her on tow... and the list goes on.
Perhaps that is the life he wanted. "Control = Love" in his dictionary probably. Our marriage was all about that- his control over everything that I do.
One good thing that came out of the divorce is that I found (am still discovering) myself. It is a wonderful journey as I approach my 40th year and I would not replace it with anything in this world.
I am:
- a cheerful child
- an outdoorsy person (love the beaches especially, sans swimming)
- an introvert & like to be by myself (I recharge that way)
- a great teacher & love being with my students
- careful with my words & can take care of myself (when it comes to attraction from men)
- firm and beautiful and deep (... and think about things people don't)
- in touch with my soul (now more than before)
- strong and beautiful
You will make it, my dear. This too, shall pass. Life will be great- this phase is nothing but a minor setback- I will get through it and emerge fabulous from my coccoon.. xoxoxoxox
posted by elya at 9:17 am
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