Writer's Block

I am now trying to write a book. I am on the second paragraph now, with only another few thousands to go. Trying to write that book makes me look at writers in a different light. I have always respected their discipline and focus, now I respect them even more. For example, it must have taken a great research effort to write something like the 'Da Vinci Code' (or its rebuttals). And I think the important thing is to keep writing, with the goal of a completed book embedded in my mind.

Weekends Unlimited

How I wish that we could have eternal weekends.. to do nothing! Today is such a wonderful day. I spent time at home, did a little workout and mostly slept with my children playing in the background. Splendid!

Moving On

Our KL site is moving and consolidating with the TPM site by the end of next month. Announcements have been made to the students and there were mixed responses. Most were generally concerned with the transportation issue. This may be a good move (in principle, for now) since there will be assimilation of students from both centres. There have been perceptions in the past of the 'other' centre's students, formed out of ignorance and assumptions.

The move was announced to staff at the Friday staff meeting. There was a mention by the speaker that there was a 'perception of inferiority' on the part of the KL centre students. Funny, as a member of staff I never thought that the KL centre was inferior to TPM. I remember the movie "Finding Nemo"- Nemo had 1 shorter fin and I somehow did not notice it till it was highlighted. Moral of the story: don't highlight your weaknesses? Not exactly. At least not to me. Is it because I'm teaching Communication Skills that I am more in tune with these little communication faux pas? Maybe the 'inferiority' issue should never have been mentioned. Or am I just too new to appreciate the 'pulse' of the events unfolding before me? Are we tiptoeing or are we implying that the KL centre is in fact inferior?

I for one, am rather happy with the proposed move. Mainly for selfish reasons. I can now leave my house late.. yay! That was the initial reaction. I've never really sat down to analyse my true feelings about the move. On one part, I suppose I'll miss the convenience of KL. And I suspect that I'll be packing my lunch from January onwards to avoid consuming food from the TPM canteen that is ever-reliant on 'flavour enhancers'. Other than that, I am a little concerned with the seating arrangements. May I please be seated next to someone who's an 'energy-enhancer', instead of an 'energy-sucker'. As at this moment I will apply positive thinking and deflect any negative energy that could affect the new seating arrangement.

Having said that, it does appear that the benefits outweigh the costs. We are no longer required to travel from one site to the other for classes. I would suspect that the student meetings may also be organised better with everyone at one place. Coordinators may hunt for anyone at 1 site, there'll be no more excuse that so-and-so is in KL. All in all, I do have faith that everything will work out fine.. and that I'll still have a job to go back to in January.

It's my Birthday!

Yes it is! I want to shout it out loud. In cyberspace.. without much publicity..

How did I celebrate today? By going to the Zoo with my kids. I bought them things. It was OK. I'm not one for birthday celebrations anyways. I think birthday celebrations are overrated. Like Valentine's Day. Too much emphasis is put on ONE day of the year, to celebrate the aging of a person (or the love that 1 person has for another). I don't buy it.

I went home and watched Oliver Stone's JFK. It's a great movie. I don't normally watch Kevin Costner. Last Costner movie that I watched was 'Prince of Thieves'. As you can see, I am not a Costner fan but I thought he did a great job in JFK.

I've got more questions now. I've always thought that the Kennedy assasination could have been avoided. No longer do I think that. As Jim Garrison himself said (in the movie), he was a dead duck (as soon as the motorcade turned into the street corner). His fate was sealed, pretty much. In a way, that's closure for me (with regard to the Kennedy theory and the thought that he could have been saved).

Being elected as the American President is definitely something significant. Would the Vietnam war have ended sooner if Kennedy remained President? In the past election, did Kerry have an honest shot of defeating Bush? Conspiracy theories have always piqued my interest, hence the faithful following of X-files and Alias (1st season). I'll do my readings and form my own conclusions. Truth may be stranger than fiction- that's what they say!

Embracing Murphy's Law

I've decided to go with Murphy's Law. It's easier than fighting it. Resistance is futile, so to speak. As expected, the medical report is not ready yet. I can only collect it tomorrow AFTERNOON, after being promised last Saturday that it'll be ready today. I was actually very upset but decided against throwing a tantrum at the doctor's office. I would actually like to come back since we do have a family account with the "good doctor" (although I seriously doubt the title now).

I arrived at the conclusion that the service in some (if not most) establishments in this country leaves a lot to be desired. For example, at the doctor's office just now, the receptionist was ogling someone outside. She'd much rather do that than talk to a paying customer. I'm such an old hag. No matter how much positive thinking I dumped into that situation, it won't become better. The report can only be collected tomorrow afternoon. I obviously can't collect it because I have an evening class. Somehow I've gotta run back, get the report and rush to KL to make it to my 6.15 class. I'll reserve my curses to the ineffiecient low-lifes in my private journal. Goodbye.

Mortal Enemy Revisited- Pt 2

I guess that this is closure. I saw the M.E. just yesterday with her daughter. My daughter is much better looking then hers.. haha! She did not remember me, even though this is the second time we met this year. Well, maybe the pregnancy obliterated her memory cells.. I don't know. She's expecting her second child, you see.

Dear M.E. I forgive you for making my Form 1 a hellish experience. I forgive you for taunting me during the year with crude remarks. I know now that the crude remarks were a result of your crude upbringing and was not caused by any fault of mine. I forgive you for making me take the blame for the lab equipment (that I had to pay for!). I forgive you for ridiculing me all those time, with your other 2 minions. I can almost bet that you drifted away from them- that would have been the reason for your success. You may not have qualified to go to US on a scholarship had you stuck with the goons. I will now take the liberty to include you as a character in my 'soon to be published' novel and reserve the right to portray you in any way I like. But then, I might not.. so bite me!

That's it- chapter closed. Forgiven and forgotten.

Tiny Margins of Difference

I went to my children's kindergarten 'graduation' ceremony this morning. Somehow I remembered the scene in "The Incredibles" when Mr Incredible spoke of how we promote events that celebrate mediocrity. On the other hand, we should reward good performances and hard-earned victories. That's me being diplomatic.

I for one do not totally agree with the need to award (gold, silver & bronze) medals for "best reader" in English/ Malay language. It is pre-school and we should just let children be children. They develop at their own pace, some faster that the others, that's what I believe. We may award prizes for performance but the exercise should never be carried out to cause others to be de-motivated.

Once I came home I looked at their performance reports and noticed that most of their marks were in the high 90-s (with 1 subject in the 80-s), out of the 100 total marks. Yet their class placement was 7 and 11 respectively. The difference in marks from student to student must be minute, to say the least. I guess the child who got the 1st place must have gotten full marks for all the subjects. One parent (whose child was in the first 3 placing) actually opened up the report card + exam papers at the end of the ceremony and proceeded to speak to the teacher about the method that his son answered every single question, about what the son did wrong and how he could have done it better. Dude, he is in the FIRST THREE!

The irony is that once they sit for the major exams (and in institutes of higher learning), there will be no 'national' placement, as such. Well, the best ones will get some prizes from the government/ corporations while the bulk, I believe, will be in the 'average' category. In universities, there will be excellent performers again, but at the end, who'll be employed? Who'll be motivated to start an entrepreneurial venture? Who'll be earning their keep with ethics and morality? Certain dropouts have become very successful and famous- is a university degree unnecessary?

I wish for my children to pursue knowledge with passion, knowing that they can make a difference with the attainment (and application) of knowledge. I'd rather not threaten them with bodily injury (worst-case scenario) if they do not score straight 'A's. Fear may be a motivator, but 'need' and 'hunger' may be a better motivator.

I somewhat agree with a newspaper report dated 6th November 2005. The Star (TM) front page carried the report on why there are a lot of unemployed local graduates. Reproduced below is summary of the findings:-

• They want only the easy jobs
• They think they should not be inconvenienced by their work
• They do not know how to communicate, especially in English
• They do not have social skills
• They are just not hungry enough

To continue, parents apparently are also to blame, because:-

• (We) over-protect them
• (We) give them too much tuition
• (We) are obsessed with them scoring many As**
• (We) take things for granted

I for one do not know how soon our attitudes can change as a nation. What I know is that the change starts in our own home and I will continue to do my part as a parent, despite the ENORMOUS external pressure for academic 'perfection'**.

Adopting a Pet Cause

Famous celebrities are doing this.. from building a home for a family in a foreign land to giving someone a smile. If I were to choose a cause to fight for, that will be for the protection of the environment. I do my small little part to re-cycle, and I make sure that my maid does the same when disposing household waste. (Am I sounding corny?)

I remember learning about 'waste' in my environmental law class in Sheffield in 1996. The name of the lecturer escapes me. I'm old and almost senile so that can be forgiven. Coming back to my story, the fact that humans produced tonnes of waste a year blew me away (I didn't remember the exact tonnage but trust me, it's significant).

I liked the ad by National Geographic (or was it Discovery?)... anyway it's one of the 'save the planet' ads that said (more or less) that we should take care of the earth because it's the only home we have. I am usually very critical about ads and their approach but I definitely agree with this one. Deep and very true.

Did we ever ask why?

The Al-Qaeda network seemed to be admitting to bombing a number of locations. What is the cause.. might I ask? If the attack on Iraq did not take place, would there be less incidents of bombing? What will be the conclusion of the Iraqi conflict? Will the day arrive when American troops leave Iraqi soil? Will the Palestinians and Israelis eventually shake hands and live together in peace? Are the citizens of Afghanistan happy with their new-found democratic rights?

I don't have information beyond what the media is feeding me. I am also speaking as an ignoramus who's not really in tune with world affairs. But like the many Ms World (TM) contestants, I do honestly crave for world peace. Is there any way that we could all sit down and talk? Someplace neutral where there are no threats of indictments or bodily injury. IMHO, sometimes it's important to listen and fix the root cause, rather than taking the offensive. Shouldn't we try to understand why? If we continue to use firepower, I suspect more violence will erupt. You-get-what-you-give-out kinda thing. Is there another way? Did we consider an alternative? Are we battling a disease that continues to spread out of anger and bitterness or are we looking for solutions?

Maximum Inefficiency

We took a loan from "a bank" to buy the house that we're staying in and it seemed that FOREVER had passed while I wait for them to release the money to the Vendor. Why oh WHY???? They are super INefficient. Processing of the documents have taken WEEKS following the advice letter. I guess they follow the policy "get it right the first time and take your time". First it was the valuation- it sat at the valuer's office since SEPTEMBER. Now it's the insurance application that we submitted in AUGUST! Why the hell weren't we told IN AUGUST (or at least September, give or take our 'culture' for urgency) that we had to do a medical checkup?

I remember a client "A.N." when I was in practice. He must have jinxed me. His argument (in between profanities) was that the firm was not fast enough to lodge his documents & the bank (another bank, not 'a bank' referred to earlier) took its time to release the money. He had wanted to use the money to pay for his father's medical bills. That was the gist of it. I never told anyone about it, except of course the owner of the firm (because he deserves to know when the bank comes a calling). To cut a long story short, grumpy A.N. finally got his money. I also met him in the office when he came to collect his set of documents. My assistant attended to him. He didn't say a word to me and I had nothing to say to him either. And that was that.

I do hope "A.N." has found his peace after the fact, with his father in the pink of health. Now I worry for my own situation. Mum was admitted yesterday and it appears that the cycle has begun again. I really dont know what to do. Somehow I'm not worried. I'm actually more worried about hubby's trip to Dubai, with the world's current state. Why? Have my instincts gone haywire? Nowadays even my gut feeling proves unreliable. I don't know what chakra to tap into anymore... Well, as always, a prayer or two would help. On top of human effort and initiative to make the best of every living day. That much I believe.

Xiaxue and Handicapped Toilets

It's interesting.. what has happened to this woman. She must have gotten more famous after the "handicapped toilet" incident. Is the politically correct term "handicapped toilet" or "toilet for the disabled"? Because I'm sure that she was not referring to toilets that are handicapped.. rather, toilets for the physically disabled (or physically challenged?).

Blablibla.. here I am going on political correctness. As far as I know I blog for myself and nobody visits my site.. hehe.. so I can pretty much write nonsense here.

Hubby is leaving for Dubai on Sunday & I'm gonna miss him :-(

It rained at about 6.00 p.m. today. I've just reached the KL centre and parked my car at the basement when the heavens opened. It was an amazing sight. Makes me wonder how people felt when they saw the tsunami waves or Katrina coming at them.

I am a little tired so I'll be getting my shuteye now. By the way, what makes a blogger a blogger? I must find out about that..