Consequences of Bad Behaviour

We are no angels, but we should not strive to be devils either.

Yesterday I called Aiza, in the presence of her husband.

She had selective amnesia just like hubby.

But she remembered the dinner dates that I was not invited to.

She remembered buying clothes, medicine, supplements for him.

She had claimed from him the money yes, but she should not have done that.

Because there is a person called a wife on his side,

well I may not have been much of a wife, but a wife I still am nevertheless,

and the totality of her & his behaviour is just not cool.

About 19 Feb 2019, she could not remember it.

She remembered hubby telling her of his marriage to me (at some point), 

but could not remember the content of her message to her. (or when it happened)

Because it was so long ago (she had said).

What was so significant to me, the date of our wedding, 

was just another forgotten day to her,

and to hubby too probably.

Last night when hubby and I were messaging he said (I paraphrase),

"you wooed me before, let me woo you now".

When he met my mom on Friday he had said that he wasn't the one who sought me out.

[From other conversations with me had mentioned more than once 

that he had other options of women to marry, on the date we wed]

What can be deduced at this juncture: is that I was the accidental bride.

I had pursued him, and asked him to marry me.

Hence that may have been the reason that I was treated this way.

And the reason for him to still contact all those girls who were his options.

That it was never a question to announce our wedding (because it was not supposed to happen).

This would have been the reason for him to decline the sponsored wedding offer,

because the sponsors' condition was to cut off all the girls on the side.

He fulfilled his bare minimum of husbandly duties, he did what he could.

In one sense I probably did too, because he was always so unhappy with me.

It made a WHOLE lot of sense now, why I am treated like a maid by him,

and his mother too, when she visits, or when I visit her.

We were living two different stories throughout our marriage.

He sees himself as my saviour; I was so in love with him that I pursued him relentlessly,

and I took in stride all the girls on the side in a crowded marriage,

because I so love him and accepted all his terms to be with me.

oh puhleeaasse!

If I do not hate him before, I hate him now.

[and Aiza seemed pleased that we are getting divorced,

her husband sounded shocked. Go figure]

The full picture has been unlocked, and it ain't pretty.

This blog may never see the light of day.

For everybody's sake I hope it won't.

I will pass it on to my children to read, so that they understand.

How being in love has always been my vice,

and trusting every husband with my life is not always the best thing.

Please take care of yourselves my children.

Let me bear all the pain of love found and lost,

so that you never have to.

My lessons in life,

for I am only human.